When we requested Beurkens which emotion is the toughest management, she had a fast response: “Shame. Shame is a big one.”
As she tells mindbodygreen, she’s seen numerous folks in her work who’re caught for lengthy durations of time in what she calls “shame spirals.” Without even realizing it, she notes, folks caught in disgrace spirals have recognized with their disgrace, internalizing it and coloring their notion with it.
“I think shame is the hardest emotion for people to deal with because it’s so deeply rooted. It’s an insidious emotion because it involves so many things—it’s not like fear or joy or embarrassment. Shame is rooted in so many aspects of how someone sees and feels about themselves, and other people, and how they perceive the things that have happened to them,” Beurkens explains.
And not solely that, however disgrace is as obscure as it’s to unpack. “To even realize that’s what they’re contending with, to name that, is tough for people,” she says, including, “It’s really something that most people—in some way, shape or form—are struggling are grappling with, whether they realize it or not.”